Sorrowful Song
by kuri-kiki
Summary: Connections through the heart, through the soul, through the strings on his instrument. Johan, a talented violinist, feels a strong connection with the oh-so-famous pop star, Judai Yuki. However, just gazing into his eyes, there is something.. mysterious.
1. Chapter 1

**First upload on here, plus first series. Hope it's good! ;_; -Kiki.**

**EDIT: Fixed & put some line-breaks so it's easier to read. Thanks Sil! **

* * *

><p>'<em>I'm not good enough to even be close to him.. What am I thinking..?<em>' Johan - an eighteen year-old male that lived in Scandinavia - sighed as he looked down at his sapphire violin.

'_This is all I'm good at.. Playing my music.. A-And he does too.. But.. He's famous, and doesn't know me.. I'm so stupid._'

He sighed again as he picked it up and played a single note; A note that expressed his emotions. Emotions he held back everyday and poured out into his music; his violin.

It was a stupid feeling; to be in love with a person whom doesn't even know you. Johan himself hated it, but he couldn't help it. He felt like.. He knew Judai, the ever-so famous pop-singer that travelled the world. Johan felt stupid that he was so connected and dedicated to someone he hadn't met. Ever. And he wasn't going to meet him, either, which hurt more.

He leaned his head onto his violin and began to play a sorrowful song. The song made his heart shatter and his eyes fill up with tears, but he loved it. Something about the song just.. Related to him..

* * *

><p>"Are you ready, Judai-<em>sama<em>?" With screaming fans in the background, the brunet just barely heard her.

"Huh? Oh, yes, where to..?" His tired face slightly twitched into a smile, lighting up his bright brown eyes.

"U-Uhh.." A slight blush crept on Rei's face, but she responded quickly to the superior. "S-Scandinavia! It'll be a long trip, so you may sleep on the flight, Judai-_sama_."

Judai smiled and nodded, turning back to the screaming fans and waved, only to earn more screams and cheers. Heading inside the aircraft, he quickly sat down and sighed in relief.

"You know, you really shouldn't stress yourself as much, Aniki," A small boy walked up to the pop-star and handed him a cold drink. "It's bad for you to overwork yourself!"

Drinking it nimbly, Judai smiled a small smiled and looked out the window at his fans. "I do it for them. Without them, I wouldn't be here," He took another sip and turned to his little friend. "I don't do it for the fame. I don't do it for the wealth. I do it for _them_, and I hope to make their day at least."

Shou sighed. "You can't just do this forever, Aniki.. You know what your parents sa-"

"Don't talk about them," Judai interrupted, his face turning cold and stern. "I don't want to think about them ever again." Memories of his strict parents flushed back to him as he closed his eyes in frustration and irritation.

Shou sighed again. "Fine, Aniki.. But please think about life in a more _realistic _way? You can't be a singer forever."

"Tch," Judai turned his head and closed his eyes in disgust. "You think too much. The future is way ahead of us; I just wanna think about what's going on _now_," He winked a smile. "Plus, who knows, maybe I'll find someone who I'll want to spend my life with on tour!"

"Aniki.. You're so.. Stubborn." Shou groaned, but decided to just move forget about it and sat beside his best friend. Judai chuckled and added, "I'm just me, Shou."

* * *

><p>"H-H-He what?" Johan's eyes glowed with shock and excitement. He couldn't believe what his friend just told him.<p>

"_The _Judai Yuki is coming here on tour, you heard me," Manjoume, one of Johan's good friends, blankly said. "Though I should tell you since you _love _him that much." He put extra-sarcasm on the 'love'.

A slight blush crept on Johan's face. "I-I don't love him, idiot! I've never even _met _him!" He couldn't hold back the excitement and joy he held inside. "But when is it? The concert, I-I mean. A-Are you gonna go, Manjoume?" His smile was bright.

"Psh, why would I go to some horrible singers concert? He's about the same age as us and _I_ can sing better than him. And jeez, aren't you a little _too _excited? I mean sure, if he was a girl and hot, then I'd understand that, but really." Manjoume's suspicions rose. He always thought Johan's sexuality was a bit.. Odd. Johan always tried to convince his friends that he was straight, but whenever they had tried to make him go out with a girl, Johan would either make up a lame excuse or say something like the girl wasn't his type.

Johan pouted, the blush still plastered on his face. "He's my favourite artist, jeez! And please, he's a way better singer than you'd ever be!"

Manjoume sighed in irritation. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. I don't really care, honestly, but anyways. Look, my mother was so damn stupid and thought I actually liked him and bought me a ticket. So, here." He handed a light blue slip of paper with names, dates, and times typed on it.

Johan gradually took it, feeling a bit confused. "..Why are you giving this to me? Aren't concert tickets.. A lot of money?"

"I'm _rich_, Johan, remember? No need to thank me, it was just me being nice." He said with a smirk and turned, walking off proudly as he usually did.

Still staring at the ticket, Johan was speechless. He.. Was.. Going to Judai Yuki's concert? Maybe he could actually.. Meet him..?

He held the ticket close to his heart and squeezed his eyes shut, a stupid smile growing on his face. "I.. I can't believe it!" With that being said, he ran home and picked up his violin, playing his song of revelling.

* * *

><p>"We've arrived, Judai-<em>sama<em>."

Judai perked his head up and nodded, standing up from his comfy seat and walked down the airplane's steps. A whole new, giant group of screaming fans formed outside the aircraft, screaming his name. Judai sighed, faked a smile, and waved to the hundreds of people waiting is arrival.

"From Japan to Scandinavia in just a little while's time, and still you have the same amount of people waiting for you. Pretty amazing how loyal they are, huh." Shou stood beside him, looking up slightly at his tired aniki and pouted. "Aniki, you should sleep when we get to the hotel."

Judai pouted tiredly. "I don't wanna.. I'm fine, plus, I want to explore here a little.." He smiled out to the crowd, catching the eye of one specific person..

"Hey, look, Johan! There's your little boyfriend.~" Manjoume teased, basically yelling into his friend's ear due to the large amount of cheering from the crowd.

Johan stretched his neck, trying to have a glance at his celebrity-crush. "He.. He isn't my boyfriend, idi-"

Emerald eyes locked with chocolate brown. Everything slowed down; time, the world..

Johan was breathless; speechless. He had never seen such.. Mystical eyes.

Judai's eyes hazed as he stared into the stranger's deep, beautiful emerald eyes. They were so different, and held a lot of emotion; emotions which he could only identify love, sorrow, longing, and lust. It made his heart feel a strong emotion of.. _Desire_..?

"Hey! Johan! You alive?" Johan snapped back to reality, turning to his friend and literally strangling him. "H-HEY! WHAT DID I DO?"

"Aniki? You alright?" Shou asked in concern, making Judai snap out of his concentration, frowning slightly.

"Y-Yeah.. I-I'm fine.." His thoughts drifted off, thinking about the stranger. Who was he? He felt a strong connection with him, his eyes just told him that. Those beautiful eyes.. Had he seen him before in the past?

"J-Judai-_sama_, a limo is here to transport you to your hotel.." Rei blushed and gently pulled on his black jacket.

Without looking, Judai nodded, still staring at the spot he had seen _him_, wishing he'd come back, and quietly walked down the steps to the limo.


	2. Chapter 2

That night, Johan couldn't sleep. His mind was thinking about.. Him, and not in a miserable way.

His eyes.. They held such.. Mystery. It confused Johan; Why had Judai catch his eye? Furthermore, why did he stop and stare at Johan?

'_Maybe it was because I was basically the only male in the crowd_..' Johan thought to himself in bed. He sighed and tried to believe it, but something in his mind made him think differently, like Judai had actually let himself stare at him..?

"No," He said aloud to himself, shaking the thought off. "Why would he do that? He doesn't know me.. And it's not like I'm different.." He bit his lip, feeling the sensations that Judai's eyes gave him rush up his spin. They were weird feelings, feelings he had never felt before.. Towards anyone. They were mixtures of stomach-twisting, warming feeling and a strange feeling that he felt-

His body heated up as his thoughts drifted. He sighed as he buried his head into his pillow. "This is just stupid, I'm just-overreacting. Maybe I just daydreamed it. I.." He lifted his head slightly and peered to his left, spotting a shining sapphire instrument that sparkled in the moonlight. Hesitatingly, he sat up, picked the violin up, and leaned his head against it, picking up the bow in the process. Without even thinking, he closed his eyes and played his sorrowful song.

Nothing was thought; nothing needed to be said or thought. He just played his emotions onto the strings of his violin, letting the sound travel into the night..

* * *

><p>He heard it.<p>

In the middle of the night, Judai sat up quickly, hearing a grievous but beautiful tune from a violin in the distant. He got out of bed, and stood on his hotel's balcony, staring out into the city full of lights that contrasted with the black sky.

The song stung his heart, aching it that it became torturous, but he loved it. The song was beautiful, leaving his ears to desire more. But the violinist.. Where did the song come from?

"It's.. _him_.. The emerald-eyed boy," Judai, unknowingly, blurted out. He didn't really know it was him, but that boy.. He was on Judai's mind, ever since he locked eyes with him. Maybe he was over thinking, and maybe it was just a coincidence..

But he wouldn't let himself _believe _that. He didn't _want _to. Judai wanted to know the point, to touch him, to hear him, to see him play that violin..

Why did he believe his heart so much that the boy was the violinist that ached his heart?

Judai groaned, and held his forehead, his ears still full of the sorrowful music. He decided to ignore it and go back to bed, but as he was turning, something clicked.

His voice slipped out. Lyrics formed, a rhythm to the violin's song; _Their _song of sorrow.

Judai didn't know what he was singing, he didn't know how he knew these lyrics, they just.. Flowed from his mouth unwillingly. But Judai didn't mind, he liked it. He felt connected with the unknown violinist. His eyes burned and threatened to weep, but Judai kept tall, turning back to the city and letting his voice call out loud along with the instrumental.

* * *

><p>'<em>That voice.. It couldn't be..<em>' Johan's eyes widened as he heard a voice singing along with his playing. '_No.. It couldn't.. Why would.._' Shaking the thoughts away, his emotions crashed onto the strings, causing him to play louder and deeper, the song becoming more heartsick and agonizing.

The one's voice who sang became emotional and hurtful, making Johan feel a strong relationship with the other male, but it frustrated Johan that he didn't know _who _the singer was. It sounded so much like Judai, and he wished it was, but why.. Why would it be him? Frustration caused his sound to go wretched and horrid, the voice becoming stronger and angrier. Johan cringe as his ears filled with this horrible sound, but an idea struck him.

* * *

><p>Silence.<p>

The violinist stopped playing, so Judai's voice stopped singing.

For some reason, he was upset. Though he could finally get some rest because he voice wouldn't shut up, he was really upset that the violinist stopped. It felt so nice to sing a song that was so.. Emotional.. It made Judai feel so.. Warm. Loved. Touched. And connected, even though the song was so emotional and sad.

Judai looked down, scanning the city in hopes to find the lone violinist that capture his voice, and his heart..?

His eyes widened when he thought that. When did that happen? No.. It wasn't right; He wasn't in love, he just felt so strongly connected to the violinist. Love wasn't the correct.. Word. Or.. Was it..?

His heart ached. He wanted more.. It was a strong desire he had. An addiction, he wanted more. And more. And more.

Judai whimpered his sadness, feeling a shiver rush through his body as his body shook with coldness; After all, he was standing on a balcony in the middle of the night with nothing but his black jeans and a black tank top.

He sighed, coldness and tiredness hitting his body. He turned to go back inside the hotel room, when he abruptly turned around by a certain sound..

The violin. The song. _Their _song. The sound was louder. Stronger. Full of emotion. And closer.

Judai's eyes widened as he looked down, scanning the city to find the violinist - _his _violinist.

His voice broke out and started forming the lyrics unwillingly again as he scanned the city. Judai was happy again, but still upset that he couldn't find him. He had almost given up, when he saw something sparkling in the moonlight.

A violin. A sapphire violin, he could make out. And playing the violin was _him_; the violinist. He was standing on top of a roof, playing in the moonlight. Judai smiled and sung louder and full of emotion, but his happiness died down as he realised something.

He couldn't see the violinist's face. It was too dark to see, and Judai could only see the shine of the violin. Upset, he covered it up with his singing.

The music session went on for only a few minutes more, but it felt like eternity to the two of them. They were in heaven, and the two loved it. Then the song was over, leaving Judai panting from the lack of breath taken while he sung.

He spotted the violinist again, seeing the violin drop from his chin and back into his hands, and saw the figure begin to walk away to leave.

"Wait!" Judai called out loud into the night. The mysterious violinist stopped and tilted his head up to him, though Judai still couldn't see him. "Who are you? What's your name?"

The figure held his violin close, looked up at Judai, then back down at his violin. Without saying a word, he brought his hand up and almost.. Reached out for Judai.

The brunet reached out to him as well, his eyes watering with sorrow and his hair waving in the wind. He wanted to know who this person was so bad.

Suddenly, the hand dropped. The figure bowed and walked away from sight. Judai's wide eyes saddened even more as he dropped to his knees and tears unwillingly fell down his cheeks. He didn't know why he was crying, he didn't know why he felt so.. Heart broken. Judai had never felt this connected to anyone - even Shou, his best friend from childhood.

"A-Aniki..? What are you doing out here?" Shou rushed to his side, pulling a blanket over Judai's small shoulders. "Judai! Why are you crying?" He dropped to his side, holding his friend tightly.

Judai said nothing. He actually didn't know what was happening. He didn't know why he was upset. He didn't know why he was crying. He was oblivious. He just sat there, tears unwillingly falling as he stared at the spot he had last seen the violinist; _his _violinist.

* * *

><p>His heart skipped a beat as he thought about it. Did he really see Judai Yuki - <em>The <em>Judai Yuki - look at him with such strong, emotional eyes? And what for? And why was _he _the singer? Why did he sing with Johan's music?

Johan sighed as he stuffed his head into his pillow again. He should've been happy, but he wasn't.. He couldn't be. He had so many questions.

'_What if I told him my name..? What would happen..? Why did he even sing? Where did those lyrics come from? Why did it feel so right.. But yet so wrong? Why is my heart beating so fast? Why is my face red? Why.. Why do I love him?_'

He felt tears begin to sting his eyes as they fell down his cheeks. He had no reason to cry, but it stung; A wound that cracked his heart. Johan didn't know why he was crying, nor why he was hurting. He should be happy; The one he loved sang a beautiful song with him. But no. It was hurting as if it were an aftershock. An aftershock to _what_..? Then it hit him.

Johan wanted to know Judai, to touch him, to hear him, to make him be his.. He sighed, thinking about how selfish that sounded, but it was true. Johan loved Judai, a lot more then he should, and it felt so wrong how he desired him. Wait, desire..? When did he start using that word?

He gulped down a blush, and starting drifting off to sleep, thinking about the night that was stolen by the two..

* * *

><p>"Aniki! St-Stop walking so fast!" Shou ran to keep up with the taller boy. Judai was walking - fairly fast - through the city, exploring the architecture and seeing the people.<p>

He heard his fans screaming at him again, but Judai just ignored them, and focused himself on trying to find _him _again. He hadn't quite remembered the location of the house he was standing on top of, but.. He was determined to find him!

'_What if the emerald-eyed boy _isn't _the violinist..? That doesn't matter right now, I'll know when I find him. I _have _to find him.. I have to.. I need to.._' Judai repeated to himself, and in his head played the song of sorrow in his head along with the lyrics he sung that night.

"Aniki! Are you listening to me!" Shou shouted, catching his peer's hand and pulling him back. "Where do you think you're going?" Judai quickly turned.

"How should I know? I'm just going wherever!" He smiled and laughed brightly, only to receive a groan and a sigh. He pouted. "Shush, I'm trying to find somebody, now just be quiet, okay? Trying to listen for a specific sound.."

Shou tilted his head in confusion. "H-Huh? A person? Who?" He got a shrugged response. "..You don't know who you're trying to find? Reeeaaall smart, Aniki."

A small laugh and a wink. "Don't worry, I'll know him when I see him." And with a wink, he proceeded with his mission.

* * *

><p>Manjoume sighed and face palmed at his friends stupidity. "So that was your violin that kept me up all night?" A low growl escaped his throat.<p>

"Y-Yeah, but Judai Yuki was singing along with me!" Johan slurped his drink while blushing slightly and trying to convince his friend it was truth.

Another growl. "You. Kept me up. 'Til 4am. With that damn violin. And making me think. That Judai Yuki. Sang along. With _you_?" His arms flew up to strangle Johan's neck.

"It really happe- Ah! What the hell! M-Manjoume! L-Let go..!" Johan struggled as laughs and giggles escaped his throat as he tried to push his friend away.

Minutes after being strangled, the two set off, wandering their city and looking around at things. It was a casual, normal day for Johan. He didn't even think about Judai one bit, until he heard a huge uproar of screaming girls..

"Ugh.. Annoying fan girls.. This is why famous celebrities shouldn't come to this town; Our fan girl population is unbelievable.." Manjoume's eyes drifted to his friend, whom was eying the crowd. "..Don't tell me you're going to go there to see him. Don't, Johan. I'm not coming in after yo-"

Johan, ignoring his friend, continued to walk forward, completely ignoring the group of fans. Surprised, Manjoume followed quickly after him. "You aren't going? Wow. I have some new-found respect for you," He snickered.

It wasn't because he didn't want to see him, it was because he wanted their encounter to be special, and perfect. Not crawling with fan girls. Plus, it wasn't worth seeing him with screaming girls beside him. He pouted slightly, and moved on casually, ignoring the fact Judai was there.

* * *

><p>"Judaiiiii! Judaiii!" The screaming fans hollered as they tried reaching out for the brunet. Shou waved at them to try and gesture that Judai really didn't have time, but they continued screaming. Judai didn't pay attention at all. He was too lost in his thoughts, until he saw something.<p>

Emerald eyes.

His heart skipped a beat. He felt his body move and his breath quicken. He found him. And these fans were blocking his way. Without knowing, his body ran through the crowd, not knowing what to do but was determined to find him. Some fans followed him, some staying and weeping in disappointment. Judai didn't care. He didn't care at this point. He needed to see those emerald eyes.

The boy, whom Judai noticed had teal hair, was with a friend and walking away. The boy didn't say a word and stared blankly in front of him as his worried friend tried to talk him out of his concentration.

The boys got closer into Judai's vision and his body slowed a bit, feeling his chest warm and tighten. His heart beat fast - he couldn't believe he was actually going to meet him.

He heard Shou screaming out for him in the distant; he still didn't care. Rei even tried screaming for him, but Judai didn't stop. Running turned into speed-walking, which turned into slow walking as he became so close to the two boys that he could hear the black-haired one talking.

"H-Hey.. St-Stop acting so weird; Talk to me! Come on.. This is freaking me out.. What's wro-" His eyes moved slightly as they locked with brown ones. "W-What..?"

Ignoring him, Judai put a hand on the teal-haired boys shoulder. "Hey." He said in a blank tone, though he really wanted to scream and hold him so close, for some reason.

Slowly, the other boy turned, facing Judai with wide, emerald eyes. Those eyes..

Their eyes locked, staring deeply. The other boy didn't speak, neither did Judai, but Judai needed to hear his voice. "Talk." He almost ordered.

He heard the other's breath quicken as a blush formed on his face. Silence.

"Y-Y-You have b-beautiful eyes.."

Judai's eyes widened. His voice. He heard it before.. Or did he? Shaking his head, he smiled sweetly and nodded.

"Thank you. I started to think you couldn't talk," Judai laughed slightly. The other stared at him for a while. Judai blinked, but proceeded in conversation. "Hey, I saw you yesterday, you know, when I was-"

"Singing to a violin playing?" Judai's eyes widened even more.

"H-How did you know tha-"

Emerald eyes looked down sheepishly. "..I played the violin. I'm the violinist."


	3. Chapter 3

**LONG CHAPTER IS LONG. orz. Oops, made Judai seductive. Anyways, sorry about the long chapter ;w;**

* * *

><p>"H-Hey! W-Where are you taking me? J-Judai!"<p>

His emotions were mixed. He was dead-scared and thrilled.

Judai was holding his hand and had pulled him away from Manjoume and leading him into an alley. Fortunately, neither the fans nor Manjoume had found out where they went: They were practically hidden.

But then again, he was in an _alley_. With a guy who hadn't said a word ever since Johan had told him he was the violinist. His eyes just widened and suddenly pulled him by the hand - which Johan noticed Judai's skin was soft and warm.

"J-Judai?" Johan's voice slightly calmed as Judai stopped and let go of his hand. "J-Judai? W-Why did you take me here?" He was wondering if it was alright to just call him that.

Suddenly, Judai turned and pinned Johan to the wall. His head slowly raised to his eye-level. He slightly glared at Johan with hazy eyes.

"You," He started, his voice low. Johan's heart raced. "What's your name?"

Gulping, he replied, "J-Johan.. A-Andersen, s-sir!" The 'sir' made Judai chuckle darkly, almost _seductively_, which made Johan's face grow redder.

"Johan, eh," A slight evil glint appeared in his eyes. "Nice name." Johan's body heated up more.

"W-W-What do you want from me.." Johan's eyes saddened. He.. He couldn't believe he just said that, but he felt.. A weird feeling in his stomach.

Judai's eyes widened. "I-I-I.." Shaking his head, he leaned closer; So close Johan could inhale his scent, which smelt _so _nice. "Listen. What was that song you played? Where'd you learn it?"

"I-I d-don't know.." He averted his eyes; He really didn't know. "I-I just.. Played it one day when I was really upset. The.. The notes just flowed. I-I really didn't know what I was playing, but it turned out so.. Depressing; I loved it. I played it all the time now, and I just call it my sorrowful song.." His eyes half-closed, a little embarrassed.

Judai leaned closer as Johan's eyes hazed. "I see. I wonder why.. I knew those lyrics.. Anyways. Johan," His expression became serious. "I.. I feel this weird.. Connection with you. And I'm sure we haven't met before." His grasp on Johan's shoulders lifted - though Johan was a bit upset that he did - and let go.

"Judai.. Y-Yeah, I know what you mean." Johan sighed: He didn't know why, but he wasn't all that happy, even **if** Judai, his love, was with him. He proposed Judai didn't feel the same way he did, that he only cared about was the song, and probably wanted to make it a new hit single.

"..Why do you even care..?" He added coldly. His eyes hazed but stiffened.

Judai's eyes widened, gasping slightly. "I-I-I t-told you!" For once, _he _was the one stuttering. "Look, you know just as well as I do that we have something.. Special. That song is special. I swear I've never read those lyrics or performed them ever in my life. And it's only thanks to you that I know them. Not only that, but the song made me feel so.. Sad, I guess you could say, while singing it, but it felt good. But when you stopped.. I-I thought I was gonna.." He shook his head before quickly responding. "B-But when you stopped for good and I didn't see your face or know your name, I-I.. I broke down and cried. I don't know why."

Johan's eyes widened as well. '_He cried as well..?_' A few seconds later, a cold look stiffened back on his face. "Let me guess, you're going to take the song for yourself so you can make it into a song for your album, and claim it as your work, am I right?"

"What..? Why would I do that?" Judai leaned closer, gazing deeply into his eyes with a half-worried look. "Johan, I want to know you. I don't care if I'm a famous singer, I want to know _you_. There's something.. Different about you. Look, meet me at the hotel's lobby I'm staying at with your violin later at midnight. Okay?"

"I-I-I-"

"Okay! I'll see you later!" With that, Judai smiled a goodbye and left Johan in the alley.

Johan just stared in confusion. Was this good? Or was this risky? Either way, he had a feeling he'd spend a lot more time with Judai, which made him happy. But a bitter feeling crept onto his heart saying that he'd get hurt soon..

Shaking his head, reminding himself that he was over thinking, Johan walked off, soon bumping into a short kid with blue hair and grey eyes.

"Who are you and what were you doing with Aniki!" The short one demanded, a slight angry pout on his face. His voice was high.

Johan blinked. "A-Aniki..?"

The boy nodded. "Judai! What did you do with him..?" His eyes widened in shock. "D-Don't tell me you.."

"No!" Johan screamed, a blush hardening on his face. D-Did the kid really think he and Judai..? "I would n-never do that sort of thing! I was just talking with Judai, I swear!" Thoughts of what he meant flushed through his head, making his blush deepen.

Pouting more, the shorter one added, "..Well, okay, but I don't fully trust you!" His eyes narrowed. "Don't do anything funny with my Aniki, alright?" With that, he stormed away, leaving Johan clueless and confused. Johan turned, his mind full of questions, and walked home, unknowingly even _knowing _he was walking.

* * *

><p>"Confess to him,"<p>

"Oh god, no!" His eyes widened and a silly blush appeared on Johan's face, again.

She rolled her eyes. "Johan, this may be your only chance. You've held it in for what- 3 years? I know it seems scary, but try! You never know." Asuka, one of Johan's childhood friends, smiled a soft, reassuring smile that eased his fears.

"But A-Asuka.. I don't want to. He'll think I'm a freak. I mean, think about it: A guy who's famous stumbles upon a violinist that's kind of good at playing a violin; they have a little connection and the next day the violinist comes out and says 'Oh, by the way, I've kinda loved you for 3 years, no big deal.' Yeah, that's not weird at _all_, Asuka." He said bluntly, an un-amused look on his face.

Sighing, Asuka closed her eyes, noting how _stubborn _Johan was. She looked down and saw his sapphire violin sparkling on the bed, smiling an idea to herself.

"Then use that to describe your feelings! Didn't you say you had a some-kind-of-love-song? Maybe you could play it to him and he'll understand. If he can understand your other song, don't you think he can understand any other song?"

His eyes widened more, the blush only deepening. "W-Wha-! I-I don't know! M-Maybe.." He averted his eyes, feeling embarrassed. "Asuka, we don't know why he knew the lyrics. That's what he probably wants to figure out tonight. So.. I'll tell you what happens at school tomorrow, alright?" He faked a smile, looking back down at his violin, plucking the strings ever-so-slightly.

"Alright, fine. Just don't wear yourself out tonight, okay? And be safe." She smiled a sweet smile and took her leave. Asuka had always been Johan's sister-figure in his life; She had always been by his side through good times and bad, and had always made him smile. Manjoume, whom he met in middle school, had always scold him for had never taking interest in her, though, he knew deep inside, he was happy that he didn't. Johan never.. Liked girls that way, but he never admitted it: Only Asuka knew the truth, and he trusted she would never tell. But what if Judai knew..? What if.. Judai knew he wasn't..

Mentally slapping himself, Johan fell back on his bed and stared at his clock on the wall to his right; 7:03pm. About five hours to go.

He sighed. Was this really the right choice? Well, trusting someone you just met didn't sound right.

'_But I love him.._' His heart kept telling him.

'_But he doesn't love you..._' His mind told him.

"Why me.. Why.. Why me..?" He closed his eyes and sighed sadly. True, he loved Judai, but this was all too much. Why now?

Suddenly he felt tired.. His body grew week and told him to sleep. His eyelids were too heavy to open. Johan's whole body fell into sleep.

* * *

><p>12am.<p>

He waited.

It was pitch black out, but the lobby was bright with lights.

Sighing, Judai sat down on one of the peach-coloured couches of the lobby, and stared blankly at the shiny tiled floor below. He wore comfy clothes; A plain red tank top and blue jeans.

He looked up at the clock on the wall: 12:13am. What if he didn't come? Thinking about it, he acted a bit.. Creepy. Pulling him into an _alley_? Pinning him against a wall? _Smirking _that way?

Judai slapped his forehead. "_What _was I thinking..? I probably scared him off.." He sighed again, and stood up. Johan probably wouldn't come.. What was the point of waiting? Judai turned to leave up the stairs, when he heard the Hotel's doors slide open..

"..J-Judai..?" _That _voice. The voice he was attracted to. Why was he attracted to _his _voice?

He turned to see Johan standing half-way from the door. He wore a light, short-sleeved white jacket that was open, exposing a short-sleeved black undershirt. His jeans were a grey-ish blue colour, and had a matching bracelet on his left wrist. Johan looked casual and comfortable, and Judai liked that: He didn't want people to dress up for him.

Johan also had glasses on, with a light blue frame. Since when did he need glasses…? Judai slightly blushed: He actually looked very professional and cute with them on.

He looked down and saw his violin case in his left hand. Judai's mouth curved into a small smile.

"Hi, Johan! Thanks for coming," He nodded and stepped closer to Johan. The other said nothing and just stared. Judai blinked awkwardly. "..Sh-Shall we go upstairs?"

Johan nodded, but still said nothing. It wasn't like he was annoyed or anything.. He just was out of words; What _could _he say to him? Nothing. He could just stare blankly and do whatever Judai said.

Judai sighed in sadness and led him up the stares. He wanted a _friendship _with Johan, and not.. Not this.

When they had gotten to the room, Judai put in the key and turned it, opening the door. It was dark. No one else was there with them; Judai had specifically asked to have the room to himself tonight. He closed the door behind him and watched as Johan quietly put down his violin on the bed and sat, staring up at Judai.

At that moment, he snapped.

"Are you alright? You aren't.. Acting yourself." He found himself saying. True, he didn't know how he acted casually, but the way Johan was acting was starting to annoy him. Johan blinked, half in happiness and half in confusion.

"I-I'm fine. I'm just.. Tired, is all.." He lied, but Judai didn't buy it.

"Really, Johan, I just want to be your friend, you can tell me anything!" He smiled and sat beside him.

"..Judai, why did you want me here? Especially.. Why at such a late time at night?" Johan felt himself move closer to his peer, unintentionally leaning in closer to Judai.

"No paparazzi. Just so we can have some alone time without flashing cameras. Really, a lot of people were questioning me after I.. Erm, pulled you away into an alley.." He laughed nervously. "S-Sorry, I was just really eager to talk to you,"

He looked down at the violin. "I wanted to.. I wanted to just.." He blushed hard, making Johan even more confused.

"I-I wanted to s-see you.. And hear you play it next to me.."

Johan's eyes widened, along with a blush. H-He wanted to _w-what_..?

"I'm sorry if it seems stupid! I-I'm sorry for bringing you out here for my stupid reason!" He curled up, hugging his knees to his chest and closed his eyes tightly. "Y-You can leave if you want.."

Johan was amazed: Judai was a regular person and didn't want to use him for anything. He merely felt a connection and wanted to be Johan's friend.

"N-No, I'll stay, I was just wondering-"

"Because you thought I was going to use you because I'm famous? No. I'm not like that. I really do wanna know you, but it's really hard to introduce myself when you're like me.. Anyways.." He uncurled himself and stared directly into his eyes. "I didn't know you had glasses."

Johan smiled a bit, feeling a casual conversation coming along. "Mm, I do. I don't like wearing them in public, and only really wear them at school."

Judai pouted. "But you look cute with them on..~" Johan blushed hard, slightly jumping aback. Judai laughed, adding, "I meant it as a compliment!"

Their conversations went on for a while, the two earning smiles and laughs from each other, to the point they were comfortable. Judai averted his eyes to the clock: 1:22am. They had been lost in talking for an hour. Even if it was an hour 'wasted', Judai loved it. He got to know Johan well and developed a friendship with him. He also noticed little things about him: How his eyes glow when he smiled, how his cheeks warmed up as he laughed, and how his voice actually changed over time. Johan didn't stutter as much anymore.

"So, I didn't ask. How old are you?" Judai blinked. He never thought about age differences between the two. Johan looked about the same age as him.. But he was taller and more.. Muscular. But Johan was very gentle and shy.

"Oh, I'm eighteen. I turned eighteen a few months ago, so I'm only in twelfth grade. And you?"

"I'm eighteen too, but.. I-I kinda had to drop out because of my career.." Judai looked down sadly. True, he was a bad student, but he still had fun with his friends.

Johan's eyebrows curved as he gently stroked Judai's cheek. "Oh.. I'm sorry to hear that.. I-It's okay, really! Now you're doing something fun you like, right..? And I bet you can make it up.. Maybe you can come to school here!" He laughed a bright laugh, but Judai didn't smile.

"No, I can't. Not enough time. I'm only here for about a week or so.." His voice held such a sad tone. He really didn't want to leave. Not now. Not when he had Johan..

Johan's eyes widened with shock and heartbreak. Now what? He was finally face-to-face with his love, friends with him, and now he has to say goodbye..? No. He couldn't take saying goodbye. He couldn't take it.

Judai turned to Johan, his eyes watering and his hands clamped around Johan's.

"I don't want to leave! I want to stay here! With you!" His eyes calmed as his shoulders slumped. "I-I'm sorry.. I-I just-It's rare for me to find someone that I can relate to anymore.. I-I don't want to let this friendship go.."

Johan stared, but gradually pushed Judai, whom was _very _close to him, away and picked up his violin case, opened it, brought out his violin, and held it against his cheek.

Judai's eyes darted to the sapphire violin, and saw how Johan always closed his eyes while playing. His eyes slightly widened: Johan was beautiful. And he meant that. Johan was gorgeous; Stunning. His eyes were breath-taking to him, literally, and his silky teal hair just cupped his face. His skin looked soft, it made Judai want to caress it. His heart skipped a beat while thinking about his perfection. Why, though? He was just stating facts. He didn't think of Johan in any other way.

Johan's armed moved up. A sound of harmony flowed along with his movement, but soon turned into a tearful tune. Judai felt.. Hypnotized. Watching him play it.. Felt so amazing. Johan's fingers moved swiftly but smoothly to match the strings. He felt a sting in his chest, both from the song and.. _Johan_. Johan just being there made his heart speed up. Why? Maybe.. Maybe it was the connection. But he felt such.. Passion in his heart when he thought about him. Thinking about him.. In such detail made his cheeks heat up, but..

When he had started singing, he didn't know. Did he care? No, he was busy staring at Johan. The teal haired one noticed this - although his eyes were closed, he could feel his look - and his playing started to shake. His hands for some reason shook, and his eyebrows curved in a cringing way. Why was he scared by a _stare _from _Judai_? No, it wasn't.. Fear, it was something different. Something.. More. It felt as hateful as a glare, but as gentle as a smile.

He opened his eyes, only to see Judai's eyes glowing in the dark with a blank stare on his face, still singing. Johan's playing became more and more unsteady, making the song sound horrid, like some kind of massacre. Judai's singing matched the tone, his voice becoming deeper and the lyrics became darker. Johan saw Judai's body.. Move closer. Or was it just an illusion? He didn't know, but suddenly the brunet seemed closer. He chose to ignore it, thinking it was just his mind. Emerald eyes closed, only to open a second later as he felt a shift of weight on the bed: _Closer_. He swore he was closer. Johan felt uncomfortable: He didn't like the way he was staring at him.

Johan stopped. Judai stopped. He put down his violin on the floor, and stared directly back into his friend's eyes. "Judai.. Why are you looking at me like that? It's.. creepy," The other was still and silent for a while, before he gently caressed the violinist's cheek. "J-Judai, w-what are you.." The other babbled as a dark red blush covered his cheeks.

Oh god, Johan's skin was soft. Judai's gaze stared down at something that caught his attention: His lips. They were light pink and looked.. Delicious. His own lips curved into a small smile as he cupped Johan's face with one hand, feeling how warm it was. The other opened his mouth to speak, but closed it, and closed his eyes as well. Johan could hear the bed sheets ruffling a bit, telling him Judai was moving closer..

"Johan.." The brunet breathed hot breath, his face just inches away from the violinist. "..Show me your true _beauty_.."

Johan twitched when he felt Judai's hot breath, but slowly opened his eyes, leaning a bit closer then he should have towards the other. "M-My beauty.. You can't see it."

The other raised an eyebrow, encouraging him to go on. Johan smirked a bit, both aroused and teased. "You'll just have to find out.." He licked his lips seductively.

Then Judai lost it.

He leaned in quickly and pressed his lips against the violinist - _his _violinist. Johan's eyes widen as he felt the warmth of Judai's mouth on his, but softened and slowly closed as he gradually kissed back happily.

Judai pushed Johan back down on the bed, climbing on top of him, still not breaking the kiss. He sat up on his abdomen, unknowingly rubbing his bottom against Johan's body, which caused the other boy to moan slightly, and Judai _loved _it.

The kiss deepened as Johan slid his tongue in the singer's mouth as his hands explored his back. He wanted control. His tongue rubbed against Judai's and covered his mouth with his own saliva. Judai moaned slightly and bit back a surprised gasp; Johan quickly picked Judai up and placed him under him, hovering over his body.

This was wrong. All wrong. Why did Judai like this? It was wrong..! He was kissing a guy. Not only that, a guy he just met. But Johan was his violinist.. He couldn't help it! Johan was.. Perfect. Flawless. And Judai wanted to be like that.

The world spun around them and they lost track of time. Judai didn't even realize they had fell asleep until he woke up the next morning. He glanced up at the clock: 6:04am. He sighed in relief: He had to be ready by 8am.

Wait, where was Johan? He looked around but couldn't find him, but then remembered last night. His eyes widened.

'_O-Oh god.. D-Don't tell me we-_' The brunet looked down quickly and saw he still had his clothes on, to his relief, but then noticed a pair of strong arms around his waist..

Johan. He was asleep still, holding Judai by the waist, smiling so innocently. He.. He shouldn't wake him up, but..

"J-Johan, wake up.." He gently shook his friend. "I-It's morning, w-we fell asleep.." Oh, god this was going to be awkward. Judai basically _attacked _Johan with his lips last night. But then again, Johan seemed like he _loved _it.

Suddenly, a pair of emerald eyes slowly opened, staring tiredly into chocolate eyes. "Good morning, Judai-" His eyes widened and pulled back quickly, standing up with a panicked look. "Wait, good morning? W-What? W-What happened? W-Why was I in your bed? Oh, god I'm sorry Juda-"

"Johan! Johan! Calm down, it's okay! Look, it was my fault, I was the one who randomly kissed yo-"

"But I liked it!" Did he just-oops.

Judai's eyes widened. "O-Oh, I-I see.. Anyways, can we just.. Forget about last night?" He frowned. Honestly, he enjoyed it, but.. He didn't want to ruin the friendship.

Johan frowned sadly. "O-Okay. I better go, you s-"

"No, stay, we have 2 hours before the paparazzi is around. I want to talk to you, actually. About what I was going to say last night," Johan nodded to gesture him to go on. "Okay, first of all, we need to see each other more often; Possibly every night. If this connection-thing is real, I'm staying here."

"W-Wait, staying here?" Johan blinked. Was he going to give up his career for him..?

Judai nodded. "Yes. Staying here with you. But anyways, I have a question.." The other raised an eyebrow. "Will you.. Let me hold your violin?"

Johan blinked. "Erm, okay." He looked at the side of the bed and saw his violin, still out and ready to play. He picked it up and handed it to Judai, who hesitatingly took it with two hands.

Judai's eyes changed. They hazed and became much lighter, almost daring to go gold. He gently touched the smooth surface of the sapphire violin, gliding his hand up and plucked the strings. Yes.. This felt right. He closed his eyes, having a something flash into his eyes.. What was that..? It seemed like a.. memory..? His eyes widened and burst open.

"I know you."

* * *

><p><strong>WELL THEN. No, they didn't have... Ehe. Everything will be -hopefully- explained in the next chapter..~<strong>

**Which will be late. c': Going to write a starshipping fic~**


	4. Chapter 4

"..W-What?" The teal haired boy blink and stared in confusion. A slight chuckle escaped his throat, brushing off the blunt response of the brunet.

"I.. I.. I know you.." Judai's eyes hazed as he absentmindedly reached out for him, his voice and arm shaking. His eyebrows slightly curved, as if worried Johan would disappear from his life completely. "Y-You're him.. H-Him.. I-I saw.. S-So long.. Ago.."

Johan's eyebrows curved, a bit concerned that Judai was having some kind of hallucination. "J-Judai, what are you talking about? We've never met before besides yesterday!" But that didn't stop the brunet. He leaned closer, his hand gently brushing over his chest, feeling his heart beat fast. "You're him, though.. Him.." Johan raised an eyebrow, asking him to go on. "Th-The one.. I-I met when I was young.. M-My friend.. Don't you remember.. Johan..?"

_**What**_? What had happened to Judai? He was acting.. Strange. Like last night, honestly. It was starting to scare Johan, really. First Judai was so nice and sweet, and now he made Johan feel very uncomfortable. He acted creepy in a way.

Since when did he know Judai in the past? Alright, admittedly, Johan did felt a strong connection with him, and it did feel like he had met him before, but he always thought it was just him and his crush on Judai, that it was just his fanboy desires. But having him openly _admit_ that his desires were _real_? No, it had to be a dream.

"J-Judai, you're not making any sense..! I've lived here all my life, how could I have met you?"

The brunet sighed, gently setting down the violin into Johan's lap as he curled his knees up to his chest and held them. "Here, I'll tell you what I remember.."

* * *

><p>Snow softly touched the ground, covering the vast town; A foreign place, yet it felt so familiar. With every step he took, the snow underneath him made a crunching sound: a sound he didn't hear often, but enjoyed hearing it.<p>

"Now, Judai, since this is a new place, I want you to stay close to me, alright? Don't let go of my hand," His mother bent down to his eye level and gave his hand a squeeze. "Father is taking his tests and will be a while, so we have time to look around this place!" She smiled softly, hoping to create a smile on her son's glum face.

"Why did daddy have to come here? It's so far from our house. Is daddy going to be okay?" He frowned, his eyes a deep shade of brown. His mother could feel his worry and discomfort. Being only six, Judai felt very lost and confused in this new surrounding. "Where are we, Mommy?"

"Judai.." His mother sighed, thinking of a way to tell her son gently. "Your father.. Isn't well, so he had to come here in order to have certain tests in the hospital to find out what it is, and see what medication can be used to make father feel better. We're in Scandinavia, honey."

The little boy sighed and looked down at his snow-covered feet. Deep down he knew his father wouldn't be alright, but he didn't want his mother to see it. The young brunet's head popped up, a small but gentle smile forming on his lips. "Mommy, let's go explore!"

The snow still continued to fall down slowly, leaving the town completely covered with white. By now, Judai's cheeks were a bright shade of pink. He wasn't very cold, but the light winter breeze was a foreign touch to his skin. He sighed, slightly smiling in amusement that he could see his own breath. Judai's mother was eying shops which carried merchandise she had never seen before, but caught her attention. Judai wasn't particularly interested in such products, as his attention drifted from the shops to something he was more familiar with..

A playground. Though it was covered with snow, children still played on it. His eyes brightened and his lips formed a smile. He loved playing on playgrounds!

He pulled his mother's jacket sleeve. "Mommy, can I go play there for a bit?" The young brunet pointed towards the playground. His mother rose her head to take a quick look at it, and noticing how many children were there, nodded."Stay there on the playground, alright? Do not wander, I'll be back to get you in a while."

Judai nodded, running quickly to park, which held the jungle gym. He stopped, staring up at all the other children around his age, possibly older, enjoying their time, completely ignoring Judai's existence. He gulped down any fear of being mocked, and climbed up one of the pink metal ladders that lead to the main platform. He calmly walked up to one of the other kids and tapped his shoulder.

"Hi! I'm Judai. Can I play with you guys?" He smiled gently. He didn't want to mess up his chance.

The other boy scuffed in disgust, eying every detail of the "_different" _boy. "Who are you? You aren't like us. You don't even belong here! You look so.. Different. We don't like different."

Judai's eyes saddened, closing slightly as he looked down and stumbled his way up to the top of the slide, and sliding down it, walking away from the playground slowly. Why did everyone say that to him? Was he just that weird?

He lifted his head when he realized he was walking away from the playground, and stopped, looking straight at what was in front of him: A bench with a young boy sitting on it. The boy was Judai's age, had teal hair and green eyes, and was fiddling with a shiny, sapphire violin in his hands. He didn't even notice Judai's presence.

Judai slowly walked up to the boy, catching his attention as the other boy heard the crunches his shoes made as he walked on the snow. The other boy looked up at him and smiled. "Hi!" The boy's voice was happy and enthusiastic, nothing like the other boy's on the playground.

The brunet blinked, wondering why the boy hadn't shooed him away yet. "Um.. Hello..?" His voice was light and questioned each word he said; He wasn't too familiar with English yet. "Why are you.. Alone?"

The young teal haired boy blinked. "I'm waiting for my dad to pick me up here. I was at my violin lessons all day," The boy smiled more, hugging his violin to his chest. "And what are you doing here? You look weird. Are you from here?"

Judai shook his head, sitting beside the other and looking into his eyes. "No, I'm not. I'm from Japan and I don't know where I am." The other laughed lightly.

"Hehe! You're funny! I like you. What's your name?"

"Judai!" The brunet smiled the first real smile since he came to this country.

"My name is Johan. Johan Andersen! This is my violin," He held up his violin, snowflakes gently falling onto the shiny surface. "Papa gave it to me for my birthday! He said that this violin will give me luck!"

The brunet blinked, poking the violin slowly in confusion. It was just a regular violin, wasn't it? "Um.. Isn't it.. A bit.. Big?" Judai noticed that the violin was light, but it was big in comparison to Johan's size. Johan nodded in agreement.

"I'm going to use it for all my life! And when I'm an adult, I'll be one of the most famous violinists ever!"

Judai giggled, "I want to sing when I grow up. Maybe we can have duets!"

The two talked for what seemed like hours; Their feet were cold from the icy cold winds, though they didn't care. The two didn't even notice their hands had intertwined with each other. It didn't matter, nothing did. Everything was perfect. They weren't lonely when they talked to each other, they never did stop talking. Though they were young, they acted like they had been friends for years, and they were old adults reminiscing on fond memories.

It felt so natural, yet so strange. Their stomachs felt like they were bubbling with anxiety, though it was a strangely addicting feeling. "Judai, you have to go back, don't you..?" The European boy suddenly said. He had read his mind.

"Yeah.. But.. Let's keep our bond! How about.. I'll come visit you when we're older, okay?" The brunet smiled innocently, hoping that he would remember this boy.

Johan nodded, sticking out his pinky and shaking the other's in a promising way. "Alright, deal! But, you know, we might change in the future.. Let's have some way to recognize each other-Ah!" He picked up his violin. "A song! A song that.. I'll play violin, you'll sing! So that when I play it, you'll know the lyrics!" Johan smiled at his own idea.

"Yeah! But-" Judai turned his head quickly as he heard someone calling his name. "-Th-That's my mother.." His head dropped in sadness; He didn't want to leave Johan yet.

Without thinking, Johan picked up his violin, and unwillingly played a tune.

It was a tune that widened Judai's eyes, and stopped every movement and people around them. The song was horribly sad, and it sounded like the violin itself was crying, but it was beautiful. The European boy half-closed his eyes, looking at the brunet, a gesture to sing along as he closed his eyes fully, flawlessly playing the rest of the song.

Upon closing his eyes, words formed out of Judai's mouth. He didn't know where they came from, they just did. Was it English? He couldn't recall. He could barely even hear himself, he could only hear Johan's violin playing; though he didn't mind.

Everyone stopped to look at the two boys, including their parents. The quality of the performance was amazing for their age.

Minutes passed. Or was it hours? The brunet had forgotten; He was too lost in the song. However, that ecstasy was ruined as he felt a tug on his arm and a loud voice yelling. "Judai!" The voice sounded angry in a way, but concerned too. That was when his vision blurred and felt his body failing him. He opened his blurred eyes, looking desperately at Johan, whom had a terrified look on his face and was yelling something - his name? Smiling weakly, he mouthed a few words before his vision blacked out on him, and he felt a great coldness on his back.

Life came back to his fingers first as he twitched them, feeling as the coldness had disappeared. He was warm, and decided it was safe enough to open his eyes. In a slow, calm effort, Judai's chocolate eyes met similar ones of an adult male and female, staring down at him with worry covering their faces.

"Judai!" His mother almost screamed, wrapping her arms fully around her small son. "We-We were so worried about you! You scared us so much!" Her grip tightened as his father ruffled his son's hair in a loving way, a small, weak smile on his face.

"W-What happened..?" The brunet's senses were hazy, his vision blurry, his ears plugged. His mother pulled back, running her fingers through her son's soft brown hair.

"You collapsed, Judai, while you were singing with that.. Boy." _Johan_. What had happened to him? His eyes widened as he desperately looked across the room. Where was he? Didn't he come? Why isn't he here?

"J-Johan! W-What happened to hi-" His parents frowned, a scowl appearing on his mother's face.

"That boy did this to you. You don't have to worry about him, we took care of hi-"

"You did _**what**_?" Judai yelled, sitting up from his lying position. "What happened to him? I-Is he okay? Is he in jail? Is he.. D-dead..?" He gulped.

His mother was about to speak, until his father shook his head and spoke. "No, Judai, I had a feeling you liked this boy," His father was the only one that truly understood him, even though he wasn't closed to either of his parents. "So I made sure your mother didn't go overboard." His eyes shifted to glare at his wife. "He's fine, Judai, I didn't think it was his fault. We were there watching you, and all he did was play his violin, quite well, actually."

The brunet's face brightened in happiness. His father read his mind.

"But, unfortunately, we're leaving in the matter of hours. You can't go and see your little friend again. I'm sorry, Judai, but your friendship.. Wouldn't last. You live on opposite sides of the world, and plus, you're young. Maybe you'll see him when you're older!" His father pat his shoulder to make him feel a little better, but failed. Judai didn't want to leave; He loved it here. He wanted the friendship with Johan to last, and wanted to stay _here_. He actually loved the coldness and snow.

Leaving the snow-covered-land. The land he wished to return soon, but probably wouldn't, and that saddened him most. He loved everything about this land, despite being treated poorly by some.

Judai sighed sadly and removed his gaze from the window to his twiddling fingers. The lyrics were still fresh in his mind, and he hummed the tune while singing the lyrics in his head.

_Johan_. He didn't know why he cared for him so much. He was.. Different. One of the only people he knew that truly accepted him and liked him, unlike his other 'friends'. Only Shou truly liked him, though their friendship was somewhat awkward, in his opinion. But Johan.. Johan liked him, every bit of him. They had talked for hours, but it felt like years. Can people bond that quickly?

Sighing, he reached into his little pockets and looked lazily out the window; They had already lifted off, and Judai could only see white. He squirmed in his seat a bit, feeling eager to get the day over with. He was about to close his eyes and nod off in a sleep - it was a _very _long flight - before he felt something in his pocket.

Blinking, Judai took the unknown object out of his pocket and saw it was a piece of paper with scribbled handwriting on it, written in English, which Judai could barely understand. It read;

_Don't forget. In ten years, come here again and visit. Don't forget me, Judai. And I'll never forget you! _

_-Johan._

_P.S.: I forgot to tell you, your eyes are beautiful._

His cheeks flushed when he saw the last line. Checking to see his parents weren't looking, Judai quickly took the note and hugged it to his chest, a warm smile on his face.

_**Johan. Johan. Johan. Johan. Never forget that name. **_

* * *

><p>"..Y-You're lying!" Johan frowned, though he was shocked, he held a bit of hope Judai was telling the truth. "My mother told me you- th-the boy died!" His eyes watered a bit as childhood fears crept back to him. His mother quite didn't described how the boy died, so it made his younger self feel guilty about 'killing' him.<p>

Judai blinked before chuckling. "Do I look dead to you? Johan pouted a bit, shifting uncomfortably on the bed. "Well, no, but.. I don't really remember that," He chuckled awkwardly. "I do remember that note, though, and something about meeting a boy that I _really _liked," He genuinely put emphasize on the 'really'. "But honestly, Judai, I think.. You're right about it. I've always felt.. Somehow close to you. I know it sounds creepy coming from a person you just met, but I just.. I just thought I knew you, like a bond was there between us, and I thought we would meet! But.. I never.. Really believed myself, I thought I was just another fan boy with a stupid crush.." Johan unknowingly let everything out. He wanted Judai to know how he felt - not about his love, but about the bonds. He would hate himself if he confess-

His eyes widened as Judai stumbled on his words. "I know, I had that feeling too when I first saw your ey- Wait, crush?"

A blush deepened on Johan's cheeks, his voice weak. "Y-Yeah, l-like.." He pouted, trying to think of a logical explanation. "..An idolized-type-of-crush." Johan turned his head, avoiding all eye contact with Judai. He made everything awkward, didn't he?

Judai blinked for a bit, processing everything he said before nodding. "Mm, I see. Ever since I was on the plane, I felt as though I was forgetting something - or someone," He chuckled as he placed a hand on Johan's, making him turn redder. "Good thing I came back." He winked seductively, a glint of gold sparkling in his eyes. Johan hated that smirk, it made his stomach turn and made him feel a foreign feeling in his lower body.

"U-Um, y-yeah.." Johan breathed, feeling a bit more comfortable enough to take Judai's hand and squeeze it. Judai's smirk slowly softened into a smile.

"Johan, come on, it's seven, let's go eat breakfast." Their morning went by slow, only awkward conversations between the two. Judai didn't want Johan to go, so he constantly made excuses for him to stay.

"Johan..?" The other boy perked his head up.

"Yes, Judai?"

"That kiss last night.. I'm sorry," The brunet looked down awkwardly, a frown forming on his face. "I couldn't control myself. I'm sorry if it made you feel uncomfortable. I-I'd like it if we could st-still be friends..?"

A faint smile appeared on Johan's face. "Only the best, then yes." With a chuckle, Judai led him out of the hotel, a slight shiver coming upon him as he cuddled closer to Johan for heat. "W-Where are we going?" Judai had what he wanted, right? Then why did he continue to pull him along?

"Somewhere. I want you all to myself, Johan."


End file.
